A Shrek wedding apparently. (Source)
Folks let me tell you about the climate of wedding ceremonies these days--cause it gets weird, cliche, and overdone faster than you can lick the stamps for your invites.
Neither Dennis nor myself are religious people, so the thought of a religious ceremony never entered the picture. Neither of us were really even raised in a religious environment, so the culture behind the religion isn't of particular importance either. Both of us like to see the beauty and importance in day-to-day life as well as keep honor and dignity (Did I say that?) in our respective characters because we believe it's important for our humanity not for divine purpose. We're our own people--grounded in our own familial and socio-cultural backgrounds. But, I for one, never allow myself to feel weighted down by some traditional obligation. That is--unless I like it!
Well, we're definitely not the only ones.
Couples in every nook and cranny of the U.S. these days are opting to make their weddings as personal as possible. Many brides and grooms nowadays are adopting a(n awesome) take-it or leave-it approach to traditional weddings. Hate the garter toss? Screw it. Don't like the whole "You may kiss the Bride?" schpeal? Leave it out!
Lots of folks are even taking it a step further--instead of just editing the
Now I'm ALL FOR sticking it to the man. In general. And most of the time. But when you're trying to write your own ceremony and looking for inspiration, you read some... really uninspiring stuff. Here's are a few of the doozies that I've found--and their related, but different counterparts that really stuck with me.
Schmeremony? Sand mixing. Becoming very common with coastal folk. So Joe from the Jersey shore marries Becky from South Beach and both of them get a cup of sand from their home beaches and mix them together in front of everyone and keep this can of mixed sand to display in their home. What? So... you can pour sand. Together. And keep it in a jar. It just falls flat to me.
Ceremony! Unity cocktail or wine. I wouldn't be surprised if this originated with a couple Californians. The happy couple invents a cocktail that defines them or each pick a bottle of wine for themselves. During the ceremony, the Officiant (or as I like to say--Celebrant) says some words about individuality, and the couple pours the stuff together and then split the glass. I mean, at least you drink this one!
Schmeremony? I don't know what you'd even call it. The Celebrant opens the ceremony and asks everyone present to take a moment to pray/concentrate... To be honest I'm a little confused how people even dress this up as anything but "Please radiate good vibes, Dude." My main problem is--it's really intangible. Most of the people we know would just sit there a bit confused. I mean, it's intent is great--but really? I think you'd need a specific crowd not to have at least one eye-roll.
Ceremony! Believe it or not--Audience participation. The Celebrant (usually towards the beginning of the ceremony) asks everyone present to stand up and shout! I've found several actual phrasings that I love a whole bunch--most of them involve asking the couple to face their gathered friends and family while they rise. Next, the Celebrant makes a schpeal about forming a community of support for the newlyweds and asking the audience if they promise to love, support, and help the new couple through their new lives as best they can. Everyone who feels comfortable shouts something like "YEAH!" or "WOOOOOO!" You get the picture. I love it!
Schmeremony? Handfasting. You tie a rope around your arms to signify that you're being bound together--it's based off an old Celtic tradition. Like you're actually physically tied to them. At all times.
Ceremony! Handfasting. Ok, I love it. But I'm an Irish girl. And nowadays they're usually more flexible with the ceremony wording--I even read one ceremony where they read Ogden Nash's famous "To Love Is Not to Possess" poem immediately after. A modern update on an ages old and culturally relevant ritual? Yes, please.
***Disclaimer: I frequently 'yuck' other people's 'yum.' I'm not trying to be hater, and I apologize. I'm just quippy, and a little bit of a smart ass, and that's how I roll. You and your's should do what feels right for your ceremony. ***
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